Mother of the Groom Dress Search

Hey friends! Here we are and once again it’s Monday. Seriously, I’m ready for a 4/3 (weekday/weekend) split, instead of a 5/2. You know what I mean? Are you with me? How do we go about getting that taken care?

So a lot of y’all know our family has a big event at the end of next month. Wow! I can’t believe it’s almost here. Our son is getting married Memorial Day weekend, which means I’ve been on the hunt for a Mother of the Groom dress.  I thought today I’d share my experience with you and a few tips I learned along the way.

I’d walked through Nordstrom shortly after the engagement just to see what was available. I had a pretty good idea of what I was looking for and saw a couple of dresses that fell into that category.

My original thought was I’d go with a short dress, but I was waiting to follow Erin’s moms lead. I already had in my head that I wanted something neutral and then I kept having people tell me this funny little tidbit. They’d say, “You know what the grooms mother is supposed to do? Wear beige and keep your mouth shut!” Sweet, I was already a step ahead. I was looking for beige and doing my very best to keep my mouth shut. (And if you know me, then you also know this was an exercise in self restraint…lol)

I’ve gotta’ be honest with you. I really thought this would be a breeze. I’d order a bunch of dresses from Nordstrom, which I did, and they’d all be wonderful (LOL) and I’d just pick one.

Well, I ordered 8 dresses from Nordstrom and one was the front-runner but was going to take some major alterations, so I decided to continue the hunt, but held on to it as a back up. Now can you believe I don’t have a single picture of me in that dress or any of the others I ordered? I’m not sure how that happened, but it sure did. #bloggerfail

Anyway I’m going to share a lot of the other dresses I tried on with you. A lot of them are not flattering and so you have to know that this me being vulnerable and keeping it totally real with y’all. Let me just say, if you’ve got a child getting married in the not too distant future, start that dress hunt NOW. It was way more difficult than I thought it would be.

Back in January I stopped in Macy’s and tried on a couple of dresses that where basically what I had in mind. The problem was that none of them were available in petite and for this style of dress, I was really going to need one.

My plan was to stick to something nice and neutral. Easier said than done.

When Katie was home for spring break and Elizabeth was here we got serious about finding a dress.

The next four dresses are just some I tried at the first bridal shop we visited here in California. The girl who helped us was super sweet, but she didn’t have a clue about my style so most all of the ones she brought me to try were big “NO’s”.

OH, and just let me tell you in case you have never been through this. All the dresses are larger sizes, so you put them on and then they use some huge clips to make them “look” like they fit. If you find “the one” then they order your size.This was the second bridal shop and we were pretty much on our own and had already been told there was not enough lead time to get any of these dresses, which I’ll be honest with you, I find to be pretty incredible. All the other shops I visited would check and see what was and wasn’t available, so I find it hard to believe this place can’t get any dresses in, in under 3 months. They told us the same thing when we went in looking for prom dresses a few years ago. Never the less we pulled a few just to see if we really loved any.After the first two stores we extended our search down into San Jose and hit David’s Bridal. At this point, I’m beginning to panic. Some of the dresses are ok at best, but nothing has “wowed” us. I did actually like the cut of the black dress, but it was only available in black and there’s no way I’m wearing black.

So up to this point, it’s looking like I’m going to have to have this dress from Nordstrom basically remade.

I guess you could say Katie’s little sickness that precipitated my unexpected last minute trip to Nashville was a blessing, because it gave me another opportunity to look for a dress.

This one was at Macy’s and I did actually buy it as yet another back up…but the next day I found “the dress”, so I was able to return it.

The day before I was leaving to come home we went to the best bridal shop. The White Room. Several people had recommended it and so I took their advice. Boy-o-boy was I ever glad I did. The girl who helped us was just as sweet as could be and was able to get a sense for me, my style and what I wanted. The second silver one was a strong contender along with the last one. The last one wouldn’t be available in time, so that eliminated it.  I think there were a couple more I tried on, but didn’t photograph. The dress I actually bought wasn’t at all what I was looking for, or had in mind. She brought it out and asked me what I thought about it. I told her I’d try anything she thought I should. Well I’m so happy she brought it and I tried it, because we all loved it. I got a call last week that it’s in and when I go back in two weeks for a bridal shower, I’ll go in for a fitting and then pick it up when we go back for the wedding next month.??

So here’s what I can tell you I’ve learned. Finding the “perfect dress” is like finding the “perfect man”.

1 – It doesn’t exist…LOL

2 – You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince. Same goes for dresses. You’re going to try on a lot of NO’s before you find the YES!

3 – Find one that meets your criteria and you feel good in. You don’t want to spend the day feeling uncomfortable or frumpy.

4 – You know your body type. Don’t be afraid to speak up and ask for a certain style or say no to a dress they show you. This is hard for me. I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings, but you will be wearing this dress all day, it will be in pictures FOREVER and you have to be the lead decision maker on this one.

I can’t wait to share with y’all the dress I ended up choosing. I do occasionally wonder if I picked the right one, and then I go back and look at the pictures and I’m reassured.

Happy Monday friends and here’s to young love and being the Mother of the Groom! Love that boy of mine!

For a look at the wedding and the dress I chose, go to this post. 🙂

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28 Comments

  1. Living on Cloud Nine
    April 9, 2018 / 9:04 am

    Girl, this will be me someday. It was hard enough chosing a graduation dress, lol. You have sorted through some beauties but I know how important it is to really feel it, comfort matched with ease, grace and beauty. Eek I am so excited to see the one you chose. I know you are going to be the most beautiful mother of the groom EVAH!! xo

    • April 10, 2018 / 7:15 pm

      You are so sweet! I’m dying to show you the dress. YES, it will be you and I know you’ll find a gorgeous dress…or I can just send you this one when I’m done? Maybe we need a rotation for all of our dresses from this new stage of life…LOL XOXO

  2. April 9, 2018 / 9:07 am

    Loved this post, Lisa! I can’t wait to see THE dress! You looked beautiful in them all!! I think Benny and his bride are getting married on Alise’s birthday!!

    • April 10, 2018 / 7:13 pm

      Aw, thanks friend! You are too sweet. Well that’s fun that they will share their anniversary with Alise. We’ll both be partying that day?❤️

  3. leaculp
    April 9, 2018 / 10:37 am

    Well, good for you for perservering through the process. Yes, you need to love it and I can hardly wait to see “the one” you chose. I can barely remember mine, I think it was a mint green two piece and was short as our son’s wedding was an afternoon affair. Such an enjoyable post!

    • April 10, 2018 / 7:12 pm

      Thank you Lea! I was so happy once we found it. I pretty much cheered the whole way home. LOL

  4. April 9, 2018 / 11:07 am

    This is such a helpful post! All of the dresses are gorgeous, and I think I would pick a similar style. I can’t wait to see the winning selection. Have a wonderful week!

    • April 10, 2018 / 7:12 pm

      Thanks so much Tanya! I can’t wait to share it with you. I can’t believe it’s actually next month. SO CRAZY!!!

  5. Kellyann
    April 9, 2018 / 12:38 pm

    such a great post, so well done my friend!!! You sure did try on a ton of dresses. I really like a few of them I have no idea how you chose “the one” – I guess you just know! This wedding is going to be so amazing and I cannot wait to see pictures. Have you already found shoes? IS KT a bridesmaid? I’m guessing so, can’t wait to see her dress. This is just so exciting!!!!
    xo,
    Kellyann

    • April 10, 2018 / 6:56 pm

      Thank you friend! I did try on a ton…that’s why I chopped my head off in the pics…I was looking pretty haggard in some of them. HA! I’m just going to wear neutral shoes. I’ve got the heels from Target like the Sam Edelmans, but I’m going to order the Nine West version that are slightly lower and more comfortable since I know I’ll be on my feet for a long time. Katie is a bridesmaid. Their dresses are from Anthro (BHLDN). It arrived this week and was too small, so I just ordered another one today. She liked it though, so that’s good news. I truly can not believe it’s next month. Erin sent me a pic of their wedding bands today (they got them this weekend) It’s going to be so crazy to see Benny wearing a wedding band. XOXO

  6. TLD
    April 9, 2018 / 2:30 pm

    Great timing on this post. My son gets married in June and I am currently on the hunt for my mother of the groom dress!

  7. Kim Taylor
    April 9, 2018 / 2:52 pm

    I have been a mother of the bride and it was so easy for my dress because my daughter had a simple outdoor garden wedding (40 people!) and I had a pretty cruise cocktail dress she loved me in and I wore that! Easiest thing ever. But I know when #2 gets married, it won’t be that way! LOL Cant wait to see what you chose!

    • April 10, 2018 / 6:52 pm

      Thanks Kim! Lucky you! Being the mother of the groom is way different than it will be when Katie gets married. Sounds like we’ll be having similar experiences for both of our #2’s. HA!

  8. April 9, 2018 / 2:58 pm

    Wow! You went to more stores than some brides do! You are going to rock the winning dress! Do you have showers to attend/throw soon?

    • April 10, 2018 / 6:51 pm

      Thanks Allie!!! You’re such a good cheerleader. (how’d the coaching go over the weekend?) We go back to Nashville next Thursday for a shower that my college friends and my 2 other BFF’s are having for her. Can’t wait.!!!

  9. Biana Perez
    April 9, 2018 / 3:28 pm

    My mom got her dress at BCBG and I LOVED it on her! It’s actually very similar to the dress you’re looking to have remade at Nordstrom! I think you look great in all the dresses! xo, Biana –BlovedBoston

    • April 10, 2018 / 6:50 pm

      That’s where we found Katie’s prom dress. (she’s getting ready to use it again for a formal…YAY) Thanks for you kind comment. XO

  10. April 10, 2018 / 7:06 am

    Doing wedding photography, I’ve seen it all for Mother’s dresses…. it’s a hit or miss thing, for sure. I had one mother/daughter fight over the dress because the mom wanted one color & the daughter wanted her mom in another. I kept reminding the bride to let her mom enjoy the day herself too (I liked the color the mom picked out better too) … I think mom won in that round 😉 haha

    • April 10, 2018 / 6:49 pm

      I bet you have seen it all Rebecca Jo. I don’t think Katie and I will have that issue when she’s the bride…at least I sure hope not. Thanks for stopping by and commenting. ☺️

  11. Carrie @ Curly Crafty Mom
    April 10, 2018 / 7:59 am

    I remember just shopping for my wedding dress! I really got upset when we had gone to 4 bridal shops and I still hadn’t found the one! Lol! But, it did happen! I DO remember those annoying clip things!! I can’t wait to see your dress!!! Can’t wait! I did see a few pictured here that I really loved on you, but I also saw some that I chucked a bit at (which I know you shared the good and bad with us here! Why are some dresses even made?!). What an adventure and maybe that trip to Nashville was meant to be for more than one reason… you found the dress! And, I’m still so glad Katie is feeling all better!

    Carrie
    curlycraftymom.com

    • April 10, 2018 / 6:48 pm

      That’s exactly what I’m thinking Carrie. It was fate that I had to make that trip. Thanks for the sweet words about her feeling better too. You know how awful it is when your kids are sick and when you’re far away, it’s even harder. Happy Tuesday!!! XO

  12. Mummabstylish Mummabstylish
    April 10, 2018 / 8:43 am

    How exciting! I’ll look forward to seeing your choice! I remember buying my outfit for my daughters wedding a few years ago, didn’t find anything until TWO WEEKS before!! I was getting really worried let me tell you, Once I found the outfit I loved it, and still do. My second daughter gets married next year, so I’ll take our advice & my previous experience and start looking now! Thanks for sharing. Jacqui Mummabstylish Please stop by and join my #chicandstylish #linkup on a Thursday. x

    • April 10, 2018 / 6:46 pm

      Thank you Jacqui! You sound like my mom. She got her dress for my wedding the day before.?That’s what you call cutting it close. I’m not sure if she had a back up or not. Good luck with your dress hunt. Being the mother of the bride is way different from mother of the groom, I’m sure. XOXO

  13. Laura
    April 10, 2018 / 6:21 pm

    Oh man it took me forever to get a wedding dress and I finally had it made for me. I can’t imagine finding a dress for one of my daughters’ weddings! It will take me forever! These are great tips for anyone doing dress shopping, not just mother of the groom! Glad you finally found your dress!

    • April 10, 2018 / 6:45 pm

      Thank you Laura! Yeah, it was much harder than I expected. I was actually thinking today about when it comes time for Katie’s wedding and that we could just shop at the same time for her dress and mine, but then I thought, I don’t want to take away from her experience, so we’ll just have to shop twice as much together. ..LOL I guess that’s one way to get in extra mother/daughter time. HA!

  14. April 10, 2018 / 7:00 pm

    So exciting! I know this is going to be so difficult one day!! I’m sure you are going to look amazing. Cannot wait to see the dress you picked!

  15. February 10, 2021 / 5:56 pm

    Ugh, such a hassle! These are such great things to know IF my 28-year-old son ever does get married! Lol! Your backup dress is so YOU that I can’t wait to see the final choice! A soft neutral sounds like a good choice with the “Shut up” mantra!! Lol!

    xx Darlene

    • February 10, 2021 / 6:53 pm

      Hey Darlene! This is an old post…search wedding and you’ll see what I ended up wearing. 🙂 Thanks friend. XO

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